This time of year, the stakes feel high for many of us. There are year-end projects to complete, social calendars that swell and to-do lists that tower. Rather than come from a joyful spirit, the holidays can feel like a high stakes season.
Staying attuned to myself this holiday season while being in tune with the real reason for the season are themes I’m striving for this month. Consider it a quiet act of rebellion this holiday season to bunk the norm of overwhelm and stress and align with your true intentions this season.
That aligned feeling
In my coaching work, I have discovered that the greatest driver towards alignment is knowing what you value and living in accordance with that. To keep it from feeling esoteric, I like to explore exercises that help us discover what this looks like in reality. Ahead of the holidays, I invite you to sit with yourself, close your eyes and feel into how you want to feel this season. What creates that feeling? What activities, conversations or traditions feel like the holidays to you and light you up?
Is it a conversation with your sister? Cooking certain meals? Board game nights?
Journal to lock in your learnings so you have clarity on your joyful goals. Tuning into the desired feelings and knowing what drives them creates the foundation for better alignment.
Invest in what matters
Once you are clear on what actions light you up, look ahead at the next week and identify how and when you can invest in those experiences. Does it require you to reach out to someone to plan a coffee in advance? Then send the text tonight. Will it require early food preparation so that you can enjoy your holiday party more? Explore with specificity what is needed to enable the experiences you desire: the menu planning, grocery store trip, the food prep, pulling out the serving dishes, etc. It is important to explore with detail and clarity what is needed to make your desired experience a reality by taking action or planning action.
How we do it
What about those “have to” events we dread? When you can’t take something off the calendar but want to feel differently doing it, simple intention setting is helpful.
Identify how you want to feel carrying out holiday shopping, for example, rather than rushed. How could you have fun or a more leisurely experience chipping away your shopping list? How about grabbing a hot tea midway, having a friend join you or listening to your favorite holiday playlist while shopping?
Want to do things with more presence? Create regular reminders to breathe, repeat a mantra or end the day with a great book. How we do things can transform our inner experience.
Know your terms
Ahead of family gatherings, gift wrapping galore and endless food prep, take a few moments to reflect on what you need to take care of yourself this season to feel grounded each day. Is it a daily walk or a quiet moment alone? Then set your alarm for a 6am walk or take a short drive in the car. Remember to reflect on your needs as you graciously celebrate with and for others. Consider a mantra or word of the day to embody, like calm, light or joyful. Come back to that word as much as you can.
Visualize the (holi)day ahead
Another helpful tool ahead of a stressful day: a morning visualization. Before you get out of your bed, close your eyes and imagine your day passing in the way you want it to go. Envision being on time, laughing and enjoying the company of others and the warm feeling in your heart as you drive home. Visualize and step through how you will handle predictably hard moments and imagine yourself at day’s end if you stick with your mantra – with a smile on your face. Communicate this desire to your partner, family or loved ones.
The reason for the season, no matter your beliefs, is to celebrate, give to others and enjoy those we love while being grounded in ourselves. Rather than moving through the season in ways that don’t serve us, consider this an invitation to break with tradition to step into the season with alignment and intention.
Wishing you a warm, wonderful holiday season.
xx SJ
